First, some housekeeping. This is my life, my choices, and my mental health. I am choosing to share my perspective on my advendutures ahead. To understand why I have made the decision to travel full time, start a business, and leave tradition in the dust, it is probably a good idea to explain a few things about myself and how this all started.

Over the last couple of years, I have worked extremely hard to get to know myself and heal the pain of my past. When I started this journey, I was in a very dark place mentally, emotionally, and it had manifested physically. I struggled to get out of bed and often needed naps in between the simplest of tasks. Doing the dishes equals a 30 min nap, taking a shower equals a 20-40 min nap, doing my hair equals a 20 min nap. I napped more than I was upright, however, that doesn’t mean I was sleeping. I mostly zoned out which sounds incredibly boring, but it was incredibly necessary to be able to go to a family dinner or backyard bbq. Now, I could go into all of the why’s this was happening all the way back to the beginning of my life but I will save many of the deep details.  At this point I could only dream of being normal and living a normal life. Thankfully I mostly worked remotely so the energy and naps it would take to go to the office were minimal. I did maintain a full-time job as a financial analyst and at that time I really enjoyed the work I did. So, my path towards healing needed to begin and it started with a doctor’s visit I never thought would turn out to be so enlightening. Turns out, I have C-PTSD and with my already diagnosed PMDD, it was bad. It was recommended I seek therapy and a psychiatrist immediately as what I didn’t think was suicidal or intrusive, was in fact VERY much so. That night I sat on the couch filling out an online intake form crying through each question and that’s when it hit me. I needed way more help than I knew. C-PTSD isn’t something you cure, nor do you entirely heal from it. It haunts you every day like a stalker, always lurking in the background waiting for its opportunity to cover you in its dark world. The truth is, I know no different, my life has been filled with fight or flight or freeze. This cycle I was in full blown freeze mode. Although the abuse stopped long ago, it never goes away, you hear the words, you feel the reaction to the violence, and your heart is a complex box full of dark compartments where the keys were lost out of fear or stolen out of jealousy. Even though I looked like a functioning adult most of the time, I was a shell just waiting for the next moment to lie down to zone out once again. And so, I scheduled my first meetings with my therapist and my psychiatrist for the first time.  Fast forward to 2025. It is just barely a little half over and I feel like I have been through the ringer. It has been a fight cycle this year but not in the traditional sense. Every time I sit to relax, I am slapped with something tragically new and none of which I could’ve foreseen. So, part of that is the end of my nine-year career with a major university. A year ago, I had finally landed at the school I had always wanted to work for but sadly it did not turn out as I had hoped, a lot of which had to do with my own disorders. I had not realized how they affected my ability to work in a traditional position with being in the office more. I simply couldn’t keep up. I could barely keep up with myself and found my insomnia getting worse and my functional capabilities declining. Memory, what’s that? I know my performance was in a severe decline. I didn’t know how to get it back on track. I felt lost, overwhelmed, sad, and tired. Then one day as I was going through files looking for something, I stumbled across my personnel file had been updated and that’s when I read the notice of termination. At first it was a very panicking feeling. I called a friend and as I talked to them, I started to calm down and that’s when relief came over me with a side of fear. It’s odd to have two different feelings at once but I was relieved I didn’t have to pretend anymore, and I was fearful of the unknown change that lies ahead. The termination is not because of my performance or attendance, it was over funding constraints. I was funded by multiple sources and most of them were changing or not renewed through no fault of my own. WHEW. After a few weeks of careful consideration, I decided not to pursue another position and instead fly free. I recognize the traditional 9-5, office job is not something I can handle. Each month is a different experience for me, and I require time off as I am often completely disabled with the symptoms of my disorders and I need flexibility to work hours that work best for me. Sometimes that is 3am, other times it’s 10am, and almost never 4-6pm. Also, opening excel and creating a new spreadsheet was something I loved for a long time, now, I get physically ill with the thought of it. So now that the decision was made, it was on to figure out what that meant.  I have this ridiculous bucket list for when I retire, and I didn’t think I would ever be able to complete anything on the list and yet I already have checked off a few items. That’s when it hit me. I can travel full time, visit the places I’ve always wanted to go to via a motorhome, every 21 days is a new place. As I researched, I realized I can really do this. I looked around at all my things and thought, I need a way to sell my sets and collections. I can let go of so much and when I do finally find a home base that suits me, I can start fresh. That’s when SentimentalRevival was born. Starting on Etsy, now morphing to my own website, and to be so much more. My best friend from high school joked about sentimental moments and how I avoided them like the plague but as I am no longer running from those moments, and with my love of all things vintage, revival seemed to fit for my present-day actions. I am going through a revival of myself creating new sentiments along the way. Here I am. This is me stepping into the next chapter of my life. Enter pre-retirement.   

*If you or you know anyone suffering from severe mental illness or abuse of any kind, please seek the professional help resources found in your area. For the suicidial and mental health crisis hotline in CA dial 988 and for emergency situations dial 911.